About a month post op, I told myself I was not going to
judge until one year post surgery. I
wish I could hold myself to that but it’s difficult. It’s not blaringly obvious that I have
expanders in. I’m guessing that only people
who’ve had them before would know. But
I’m insecure that people will think I just have a bad boob job. But the truth is, this is not an augmentation,
I’m smack dab in the middle of reconstruction.
People who have seen many reconstructions before tell me they look great
and I honestly agree with them. I’m
really just ready get to the next stage where I might feel a bit more
comfortable with them.
The good news is… I’m less than 24 hours away from my next
surgery. Aside from some minor adjustments
I may have to do (all aesthetic), the hope is this will be my last. I will finally get my real fakes! From what I’ve heard, this surgery is much
less invasive; I’ll only be under for 3 hours and most likely will go home at
the end of the day. The last few weeks,
I have not been nervous at all; it wasn’t until an hour ago I started getting
butterflies. The strangest part for me
is I don’t get to choose my size. My
plastic surgeon has ordered about 5 different implants and she’s going to
choose which one looks best. It’s strange
to go to sleep and not know what you’re going to wake up with. I guess no one gets to choose what they are
born with either so it’s similar to that.
It’s just natural to think that when you get plastic surgery you get
more of a say. However, I’m still
confident I chose the right surgeon so I’m going to trust she will make me look
great.
The REALLY great news… I still do not regret my decision to
have the mastectomy. And as long as I
can still say that, things are going well.
Looking at the bigger picture, it’s not about what I look like in a
swimsuit or cocktail dress (although it would be nice to look good!); it’s
about me being alive the next 50+ years.